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After signing up to Naughty Dates, you are well on your way to finding your first date.Once inside, members are free to search other profiles and find potential candidates that they see as interesting and attractive."We see sexuality as a very important part of the human experience that is lifelong," says Janet Hayes, public relations director for the UUA. Your sexuality doesn't end after you stop having babies or get divorced or after you turn 60. We feel it has to be integrated into our spirituality because, for us, spirituality is about wholeness." So in 2008, the churches—which together have about 6,600 U. congregations and 1.4 million members—introduced classes for adults 18 to 35.(In the past ten years, it's estimated, more than 40,000 children, young adults, and adults have taken at least one OWL class.) Michael Tino, a Unitarian Universalist minister with a Ph D in cell biology, cowrote the young adult OWL curriculum and understands why the adult classes have proved popular.The women are a flurry of activity, practically tripping over each other to scribble—"played doctor," "found a pubic hair," "menstruation," "kissed a boy," "kissed a girl," "touched by a cousin," "fell in love," "lost my virginity," "had an abortion," "had a baby," "breasts sagging," "menopause," "discovered sex without love." The men look on and appear intimidated.Finally, Eugene picks up a pen and writes down "first time had sex." The other men slowly begin to join in. Judith says the exercise made her realize that one huge thing she can't control about her sexuality is her fading looks. The women return her you're-out-of-your-mind look, so she explains: "When I was young, I'd see these older women and they just seemed as if they had confidence and were wise—and more comfortable in their skin. "I didn't get any mileage out of being cute when I was young.Students in tonight's class, for instance, are in their late 40s to mid-60s.After wrapping up the discussion about self-touch, during which Tuttle encourages students to "think about sensuality broadly and not shut off the pleasure of getting to know the whole body," she and her coteacher, Michael West, an economic development project manager in the Texas A&M University system, explain the next exercise: a sexuality timeline.
"You want to—you need to—broaden the definition of sex."Get a kiss, get a girlfriend, get laid." Larry agrees.In fact, he later explains, that's why he signed up for the course with his wife of 15 years.Judith, the oldest, is an artist, and her long, curly gray hair is piled into a messy halo atop her head. "Feel the smoothness and roughness of all the various parts, the places where it's dry or moist." Some of the students close their eyes as they follow her instructions. Since 1998 the institutions have coproduced sex education materials for children ages 5 to 18; as church leadership reexamined the curricula, they noticed a need for age-appropriate material for grown-ups. Elizabeth, an information technology manager at a local government agency, is an athletic woman, efficient in her movements. So begins the fifth session of Our Whole Lives (OWL): Sexuality Education for Adults, at the First Unitarian Church of Austin.