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Is there any direct way to tell him that he needs a serious image makeover without ruining the relationship? ALISON ANSWERS: When a man dresses like a hobo he is usually conscious that he is doing it.Mark probably is making the statement that he doesn’t want to look like everyone else.But I’m really wondering why you want to date someone who care so little about how he looks, and how he makes you feel about it? Perhaps Mark is quirky but if he realizes that the way he dresses makes you uncomfortable. However, if he insists that he won’t because it is what he wants to do, then he doesn’t care about your feelings.It is quite possible that Mark feels you have to take him just as he is because he is lazy, selfish and/or perhaps has real mental problems.
Speaking of which, after six months it might be an appropriate time to give Mark a gift of some new threads. It is an obvious ploy to get him to wear what you want him to wear…
Clothes are not only a very personal gift, but most men are willing to wear things that obviously turn their girlfriends on (especially if they don’t have to do the shopping).
If Mark really doesn’t realize how bad he looks, your gifts will not only be appreciated, but they might actually change his life for the better!
What he fails to realize is that while he doesn’t have to be a clone of someone in GQ, his refusal to dress within the realm of what is considered “normal” sends the message that he wants to stand out, and push just about everyone away.
As long as Mark is not physically unclean, you might have to gently tell him that if he wants to be introduced to the people that matter to you, he should take your feelings into consideration and make an effort to show himself to them (and to you) in a more appropriate way.